


Take me up (if you can)

by Chuda04



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: A bit of humour, Dragonlord Merlin (Merlin), Excalibur, F/M, Gen, Magic Revealed, Post-Season 4, Reveal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-13
Updated: 2020-09-13
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:13:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26446897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chuda04/pseuds/Chuda04
Summary: After a confusing discovery about Excalibur, Merlin's friends end up with many unanswered questions. But this revelation only leads to an even bigger one. The warlock just wished he had kept a more careful eye on Gwaine...Reveal fic that takes place after season 4. No slash.I do not own Merlin.
Relationships: Gwen & Merlin (Merlin), Gwen/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Knights of the Round Table & Merlin (Merlin), Merlin & Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Comments: 11
Kudos: 294





	1. Look and learn

**Author's Note:**

> So I came up with this crazy idea: what if Excalibur was a bit like Thor's hammer - cannot be simply wielded by anyone?  
> This is also my first fanfic and English isn't my mother tongue, but I hope you'll enjoy it anyway!  
> Disclaimer: I don't own Merlin. All characters belong to BBC.

Ironically, no one had ever given much thought to the sword. It was without a doubt a beautiful and mighty weapon, the undeniable proof of Arthur’s true right to the throne. But at the end of a day, it was just that – a sword. It was mostly seen just as a fitting addition of their great King. Even by the said King…

Admittedly, Arthur had never held a sword so well-balanced and that had felt so _right_ in his hands. Excalibur was almost an extension of his arm, but hey, did you expect anything less from a legendary weapon? So after being pulled out from the stone, it just naturally became a part of everyday camelotian life. (After all, it was hardly the most unusual thing that had happened here.)

However, the Round Table was soon to find out that Excalibur had a very interesting unknown quality. How hadn’t it been discovered before was still a mystery, but Merlin had his suspicions. The point is, all started with Gwaine.

Okay, so maybe Gwaine wasn’t sorely to blame, but the warlock still thought it was his fault. Sometimes he was just like an over-excited child (even if he was _far_ from being as innocent as one) who had to stick his nose into everything.

So the Knights had been training together and because Arthur had enough of poring over rapports in his study, he decided to join them on this warm, sunny afternoon. He put on his chainmail, grabbed Excalibur – well, told Merlin who grabbed Excalibur (after helping him into his chainmail), to hurry up an follow him – and came down to the training grounds.

“Hey, look who’s graced us with his presence!” Gwaine exclaimed as they neared their group among other sparring knights. There was no malice in his voice though, just the usual playfulness.

Leon, Percival and Elyan all greeted Arthur with small but respectful nods and smiles, so he did the same in response. The Knights also gave Merlin hand waves, which he returned only half-heartedly – the prospect of sitting in full sun, observing a bunch of grown men bashing each other with different weapons wasn’t overly optimistic from his point of view.

“Someone has to watch over you from time to time not to…” Arthur didn’t have a chance to finish his jibe as the rogue knight cut him short with his immediate response:

“Oh, so you’re here to watch! Good, maybe you’ll even learn something!” everyone gave poor-hidden snickers, while the King sent a glare at laughing Gwaine but after a moment he too joined in with a small chuckle and a shake of his head.

“Could have worked if the Prat was actually capable of learning anything,” added Merlin, who was grinning mischievously and casually leaning on Excalibur like on a cane. At this point no one tried to hide their amusement and so the training fields filled with the sounds of the realm’s best knights’ laughter at the expanse of their King.

Arthur scowled and cuffed his manservant upside the head only to keep up the pretence, as he was also genuinely amused by his friends’ antics. And that was exactly the aim Merlin tried to achieve – Arthur may pretend he didn’t approve of their banter but the warlock knew he really enjoyed it.

His best friend was in a foul mood recently because of the amount of work he was buried in and needed cheering up. He saw how much he appreciated the time with his friends, who didn’t treat him with reverence that most of his subject gave him. Arthur was aware of course that it was only natural for the people to show respect to their ruler, he was even glad to say this respect seemed to be genuine, not ever as fake as the one often showed towards his father. Nevertheless, it was clear to his manservant that he was happy to have a group of close friends, with whom he could be himself. Who weren’t afraid to joke with him, speak their minds freely or even tell him off if he had done something stupid (the last one was usually Gwen, Merlin or Gaius with his eyebrow of disapproval – the warlock himself had not once been at the receiving end of it, so had the others. It was a serious matter…). Having ‘the Round Table’ – as they started to call their group some time ago – did a world of good to the King. To put it shortly, he visibly didn’t feel he had to carry the weight of the crown alone anymore , he had people he could actually _trust_ and that make him a better and happier person.

Despite all that, Arthur obviously wasn’t going to admit it, especially to his servant, so he did the next best thing – continue their familiar banter.

“Tell me Merlin, who has been watching us train for years and is still totally helpless at fighting? I don’t think I am the one incapable here,” said Arthur with a satisfied smirk, which only widened when Merlin stuck out his tongue at him. That brought another round of laughter from the Knights. “Just give me my sword before you do something to yourself or worse – to it. Look and learn!”

Merlin handed him Excalibur, warning not only him but everyone present nearby, “ _You_ try not to harm each other because I’m the one who will have to patch you up afterwards.” He turned around to sit under the closest arms rack, hoping to find at least a little bit of shadow. Throwing the last comment as an afterthought, “and I can and will make it as painful as possible if you’re not careful!”

“Only you Merlin would threaten a bunch of Camelot’s best knights without batting an eyelid,” Leon said with an audible fondness in his voice. This open-hearted servant had gained his own strange kind of respect from the nobleman a long time ago, but his unique personality and behaviour still baffled him sometimes.

Then the training begun. They split into two sparring groups: Leon against Percival and Gwaine and Elyan against Arthur. Merlin had to admit that all five of them knew their trade exceptionally well. They moved fluidly and lightly on their feet, every move was practised and precise. What Leon lack in strength compared to Percival he made up in speed and experience. And though Arthur was without a doubt the best swordsman in the kingdom and for now was holding his own against his opponents, Elyan and Gwaine were slowly gaining an upper hand by an efficient teamwork. No advice or commentary was given as all men were deeply focused on the fight. Honestly, none would be needed anyway as their performance was of the highest standard. Merlin caught many side-glances from other training knights around them, hoping to learn as much as they could from them.

As his friends continued duelling, a new figure appeared beside Merlin. He looked up to see Gwen standing next to him, beautiful as ever in her purple gown. It was one of the rather simple ones, though appropriate for her status as the Queen, but she still took the breath away from most of men. She smiled down at him, so he decided to also stand up, seeing as she wouldn’t be able to sit down and have a conversation.

“Good afternoon, Merlin,” she greeted him with another smile and the warmth in her eyes that melted even the coldest hearts.

“We’ll see about how ‘good’ it can get. These trainings have never been my preferable kind of entertainment, especially on such hot days,” he answered with a sigh. “I really don’t know what’s so fascinating in striking each other with shiny pointy sticks…” _They would be practically useless against magical attacks anyway_ , he thought to himself.

Gwen laughed quietly and slapped him gently on the upper-arm, faking an admonishment, “It’s important to have fighting fit knights, capable of protecting their kingdom!”

“And again I have to suffer the consequences of this protection, don’t I?” Merlin muttered and though the Queen hummed in acknowledgement, they both have different meanings of his words on their minds. Merlin was sure that one day he would be able to tell her, _tell them all,_ just what exactly did he mean. One day…

“Well, if you want I can cut down on your misery a little,” she said and Merlin’s eyes lit up with hope of returning to the security of the cool castle walls. But as soon as it appeared, his expression dulled again with desperation.

“I don’t think even you could help me today. Arthur had a rather bad day and was very excited about having this afternoon off on the training grounds. We just got down here and he definitely won’t let me leave so soon…”

“Who says anything about letting you leave,” Gwen said observing their friends. “I bet I will be able to finish their sparring in a minute – from here, without uttering a single word,” she turned again to look at him with a mischievous glint in her eyes.

“You’re on! I don’t think even a Griffin flying over their heads could break their concentration right now,” Merlin exclaimed with certainty, glancing again at the King and his Knights completely consumed by the fight.

“Then look and learn, Merlin” she winked at him before facing the group of friends.

“You’re the second person to tell me that today,” he whispered a bit fed up under his breath but observed curiously anyway. It could be fun at the very least.

Guinevere smoothed her dress, stood a bit straighter and then... just broke into full laughter. It was smooth and cheerful, the kind that lifted your soul when you hear it. Merlin could have sworn that it put a golden glow around her, giving her an almost godly look. She enhanced that feeling by putting one hand on her chest and brushing her hair away with the other. Merlin raised his eyebrows quizzically at her outburst and glanced in the direction of her ‘victims’. A look of dawning comprehension appeared on his face, fast morphing into one of amusement when he saw the effects. Arthur, upon hearing the glorious laugh of his wife, momentarily lost his focus and turned his head to find the source with bright eyes. That little moment of distraction was all his opponents were waiting for. In one fluid motion Gwaine knocked Excalibur out of his grasp, sending it tumbling into the grass. Then he knocked him down by a hard push to the chest with his shoulder and put his own sword hovering over his face, smiling madly from ear to ear.

“Gatcha! Haha, yield, Princess!” he exclaimed laughing.

“Yeah, yeah, I yield,” Arthur muttered irritably, flicking the sword out of his face with his gloved hand. “Although I still want to emphasise that there were two of you…”

Elyan gave him a helping hand to stand up, simultaneously high-fiving his partner with a smile. “And the circumstances were rather… distracting, weren’t they?” he stressed the word, glancing back at where his amused sister was coming towards them beside Merlin who was roaring with laughter.

“I have to say Gwen… your lessons are not only more enlightening than Arthur’s… but also far more entertaining!” he managed between chuckles.

“Thank you, Merlin, I’m glad you liked it,” Gwen approached her husband, took his hand and gave him a light kiss on the cheek. The loving gesture visibly lessened the death glare he was sending his manservant but didn’t removed it entirely. He squeezed her hand before letting go to flex his knuckles and start advancing menacingly towards Merlin, who started to back away still smiling. He knew Arthur wouldn’t hurt him, he might catch him in a headlock and ruffle his hair or something similarly ‘threatening’, but that didn’t mean he would let himself be caught that easily.

“Oh, I’ll teach you a lesson, you little…” grumbled the King but for the second time that day he was cut off by Gwaine.

“Hey, what the… guys, look at that,” he grunted from the side. They all turned to see what had he done this time (it _was_ Gwaine after all).

Turned out he was trying to pick something from the ground. ‘Trying’ being here the important word, as it obviously wasn’t going very well. It actually looked kind of funny, with him holding a sword with both hands, bracing himself and attempting to hold it up. Because it was indeed a sword he made all the ruckus about. When Merlin realized it was Excalibur dropped by Arthur, an uneasy feeling appeared in his gut. Somehow he knew this wasn’t going to end well…

“Wow Gwaine, you found my sword which you have just knocked out of my grasp, amazing” Arthur said ironically rolling his eyes.

“Guess he deserves a handsome reward,” jibed Percival. He was a rather quiet person but Merlin noticed he actually had a great sense of humour and was very observant.

“Ha ha, very funny Percy,” Gwaine answered drily and directed his next question towards the King “But seriously, since when is Excalibur so… reluctant to change positions?”

“Excuse me? What are you talking about? Have you been drinking earlier?” asked Arthur bemusedly, even though he knew that his friend wouldn’t do that.

Since he became a knight Gwaine cut down on the alcohol he consumed. He still drunk, don’t get the wrong picture here, but never before trainings or on duty - only when he had some time off. Merlin even asked him about his ‘change of habits’ and he admitted that he really appreciated the home he found in Camelot and the friendships he built. He cared about ‘all of this’ (as he intelligently defined his new life) and didn’t want to lose it, so decided to do everything he can to protect it. That’s why he actually took his responsibilities quite seriously, even if it didn’t look like that on the surface.

“Have you hit your head a little too hard when I knocked you down? ” he riposted immediately with irritation in his voice. “It’s not that it is too heavy or something, more like… immovable. Won’t budge even a little. See for yourselves if you don’t believe me.”

Gwaine let go of the sword when the others gathered around him. Merlin immediately reached with his magic trying to determine if anything was wrong with Excalibur. His eyes didn’t turn to gold, as this was one of the most instinctual parts of him. No incantations or spellwork were needed, he just willed to expand his ‘mind’s eye’ towards the item to check it out, magically speaking. However, he saw at once that all was normal. The sword gave an incredibly powerful magical aura – but that _was_ perfectly normal, it having been burnished in the breath of a dragon and all.

Arthur came next to Gwaine, examining it himself. Merlin was on high alert expecting a sudden attack as if the sword would just spring up and start cutting them all down. The tension was palpable when Arthur bent down… and just picked Excalibur up, without any problems. Everyone let out a collective breath of relief, only then realising they were holding it. Everyone…except Gwaine who looked dumbstruck with eyes flipping from the sword in the King’s grasp to his blank face.

“Great joke, Gwaine. You got us all for a minute there. But maybe next time make sure your jesting can’t be debunked so easily,” he commented drily with a mix of irritation and relieved amusement.

“What?! How did you…? You’ve got to be kidding me…!” the Knight’s eyes widened even more after finally finding his voice.

“Maybe it’s just heavier than you expected,” Leon said placatingly.

“Or you’re not as strong as you expected…” quipped Percival with a smile extending his arm towards Arthur in silent enquiry for Excalibur. He started handing in to him, while the long-haired knight spluttered indignantly at him.

“Yeah, Big Guy, because…” he was definitely preparing a long and witty tirade but the moment Excalibur was set in Percival’s hand, the tall man was sent to the ground with a small grunt of effort. “HA! You see what I mean now?!”

Indeed Percival’s hand was trapped under the hilt of Excalibur, no matter how hard he tried to get free. However, it didn’t seem to be crushing his fingers but just prevented him from raising the hand up. Everyone scrunched their eyebrows in confusion again, while Merlin looked around the training grounds.

“Guys, I think we’re making quite a bit of a scene. Let’s go somewhere more… discreet,” he whispered fast to the others and without thinking bent down to free his friend from the burden. Only after standing straight again he realized what had he done – that is, casually picked up Excalibur… which was just proved to be impossible for two Knights. The warlock mentally face-palmed himself. _Sometimes his stupidity astonished even him…_

“Just… go change and meet us in my study as fast as you can,” Arthur commanded quickly also noticing the stares they attracted from others that were training around them. He gave one last measuring look at Merlin, then waved at him to follow. He intertwined his fingers with Guinevere’s and took off in the direction of the entrance to the castle, without giving a second glance at their audience.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

At the beginning of his reign Arthur felt a bit uncomfortable in the King’s study, considering it had previously belonged to his father, but he got used to it. Truth be told, circumstances kind of forced him to. It became clear very early that doing all the terrifying amount of work in his bedchambers was not only extremely inefficient but also quite inappropriate at many occasions. He couldn’t house formal talks with nobles or private negotiations with visiting royals from other kingdoms in the same place he slept or ate. The Throne Room was good for audiences, first impressions and greeting guests but business was another matter entirely. And they used the Round Table Council chamber for the parts of visits when all Royal Council should be present (apart from the Council meetings themselves, obviously).

So he had moved with his work to the chambers intended for it. And it had been a right call. The desk that stood in front of the door under a window was a quiet and peaceful workplace. The bookshelves, cabinets and chests rimming the walls held many rapports and useful documents and the rather big table for 8 people that stood on the right side of the entrance, though not round, was perfect for discussing pressing matters with any visitor.

When the Knights and Arthur were clean and dressed in fresh clothes, everyone gathered in the spacious chambers. Among them was also Gaius, whom Arthur summoned on their way here by giving an order to a passing guard. He had patiently listened to their story with furrowed brow, humming from time to time in acknowledgement. Arthur really hoped he could shed some light on the fact that no one, apart from himself and _Merlin_ of all people, was able to pick up Excalibur.

Because that indeed was the case. After coming here, everyone took turns trying to lift it from the table and they discovered only Arthur and Merlin managed it without problems. The others couldn’t made the sword move even slightly.

“And you say that during the training nothing was amiss? I mean, you deflected Arthur’s blows as always?” the old man’s question was directed to all knights, who nodded in confirmation.

“Just like every other day. The issue is that they just can’t wield it. Excalibur didn’t crush Percival’s fingers, just trapped them, so it obviously doesn’t weigh more than it should,” Merlin supplied with surprising perception. It was actually a good point. Arthur didn’t even noticed it.

Gaius and his ward gave each other considering looks, apparently coming to some silent agreement, as the Physician’s next words had an air of finality to them:

“I can’t give a definite answer now, My Lord, but I am fairly sure that some of my books contain useful information on similar subjects. If you spare Merlin for the rest of the day, we’ll get on in right away.”

“Yes, of course. I’ll manage on my own, just make sure someone brings us the supper,” the King said the latter to his manservant, indicating himself and his wife.

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll ask Missy to take over for tonight,” Gwen countered, referring to her own new, young handmaiden.

“Thanks Gwen, you’re the best. We’ll be off then,” Merlin was already heading out of the room, Gaius at his side. The lack of any parting joke toward Arthur was the evidence of his absent-mindedness caused by worrying over the matter at hand.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Their walk to the Physician’s chambers, though short, was a rather tense one. Both wanted to ask the other many questions but they couldn’t risk speaking freely in the corridors, so they restrained from speaking altogether, in favour of getting faster to their destination.

Once there, Merlin closed the door behind himself and leaned back on it, thumping his head on the hard wood. Then he let out a loud sigh simultaneously massaging his temples. He could already feel the headache building. “What a mess… Why something always have to happen? The last few months were so peaceful…”

“Well, it’s Camelot we’re talking about. I must say that I am amazed how long this break actually was.” concluded Gaius plainly. And Merlin agreed with him, which after a second thought was kind of sad. He should have expected some trouble. And even if he had, Merlin was more prepared for trouble in the form of beautiful mad woman than stubborn swords. Apparently, it was one of _these_ days. Although the long absence of Morgana was a bit worrying too… But that was a matter for another time, _focus on the here and now,_ he told himself.

“Too true. So any idea what could have caused Excalibur’s… condition? And before you ask – no, I can’t feel anything wrong with it. It is still the powerful magical weapon, of which Arthur takes care like of a found puppy. Couldn’t sense any curses, malignant enchantments and so on,” he beat his guardian to his question, seeing Gaius opening his mouth to do just that.

The man’s left eyebrow rose in contemplation, thinking over the words. “From your summary, there wasn’t much time to cast one anyway. It laid in the grass unsupervised only a moment, and Gwaine get to it almost instantly…” he said at last, turning to his impressive collection of books. He visibly started to search for a one he must have had on mind. “Though if I remember correctly, enchanting a weapon burnished in dragon’s breath is no easy feat…”

Merlin went to the kettle on the cold fireplace, while Gaius continued his search – they both could use some hot tea. He poured the water into two wooden cups and warmed them with a quick flash of gold in his eyes. In the time he added their favourite herbal mix, the Physician seemed to have found what he was looking for and joined him at the table. He exchanged one of the cups for an ancient-looking tome, which he slid onto place in front Merlin. His mentor’s eyesight wasn’t what it used to be and he would need his magnifying glasses to read the scribbled words, so he preferred to just let Merlin do it.

“There are a few chapters on weapons blessed by magical creatures. It’s written in Greek combined with Brittonic, so it’s a bit confusing, but since you know both you should manage,” he said offhandedly, taking a small sip.

Not for the first time Merlin was grateful for the thorough education he was getting as Gaius’ ward. He found what he was speaking of and skimmed the text quickly. “Fairies’ fortune…no…unicorns? They give blessings…?” he was muttering under his breath along the way, until he gave a quiet ‘Ha!’ of success. Silence fell in the chambers for the time Merlin read through, giving a huff after some time.

“Turns out your memory is practically impeccable – there is no known way of enchanting a weapon forged or burnished in dragon’s breath.” Merlin looked back at his mentor. “According to the author, the magic is simply reflected or absorbed by it. I wonder if it means Arthur can deflect spells thrown at him with that sword…”

“What it _means,_ Merlin,” Gaius snapped him back into focus, “is that Excalibur must have been like that since the beginning. But why…”

“Why would Uther have been able to fight with it then?” Merlin finished for him. “I got a good scolding from Kilgharrah when that happened,” he remembered with a grimace.

“If that is the case, the best option is asking these questions to the sword’s maker.”

Merlin looked at him with confusion written on his face. “But Gwen and Elyan’s father has died a long time ago, so…”

Gaius slowly covered his face with a hand in disbelief, “Kilgharrah, Merlin… I meant Kilgharrah.”

Merlin’s face reddened in embarrassment. In moments like this he understood why so many people called him an idiot. He finished his drink with one large gulp and stood up. “Erhm, right, that makes sense.”

“Hold up a minute. You’re going _now?”_

“Well, everyone else already thinks we’ll be here, searching for an answer for the rest of the day. I’m not expected to do anything more, so I may very well use it to meet up with him and get back here before it starts getting late. Maybe at least once in my life this rendezvous won’t cost me a full night’s sleep,” he summed up with resignation and went to his room to get ready.

“It will cause another evening worrying over your safety for me instead,” sighed equally resigned Gaius.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Gwaine came closer to the sword lying on the table, when the door closed with a soft click after the two men left.

“ _’Take me up’_ – quite an irony if you ask me,” he said reading the engraved words on the side of the blade that faced them, trying to light the mood. “Your legendary ancestor had to be a real scream, Princess, to write this on a sword that could be wielded only by a few people.”

“Yeah, a taunt for anyone who may ever try and then fail miserably,” Leon huffed in puzzlement.

“I still can’t believe it wasn’t discovered earlier. No one, except the two of you, has ever carried it?” Gwen mused quietly, looking at her loved one.

Arthur wanted to tell that _of course, many people have carried it before,_ but after a second of thought he had to admit that he wasn’t sure. For a long time Merlin had taken care of his armour and weapons in person. He was almost _protective_ of it. He couldn’t say he remembered seeing any other servant, or anyone else really, carrying any part of his armour, especially Excalibur. Usually there was really no need, as when he didn’t have it on him, the sword rested in his chambers.

“It appears so, though trust me – I am as confused as any of you,” he answered finally.

“If it concerned only you, it would be somewhat understandable. You’re the rightful King of Camelot and the descendant of Bruta. But why Merlin? He’s… you know. I like him, he’s like a brother to me and I mean no offence, but well…” trailed a bit awkwardly Elyan, gesturing with his hands to make his point.

“We can’t even be sure if Excalibur has always been so ‘reluctant to change positions’ as Gwaine defined earlier. For all we know, it could be a new or temporary development…” Leon, however worried, tried to be the voice of reason.

“We should find the cause even if that’s the case – especially then, I would say. I’m trying to determine _why_ anyone would do that. It’s definitely strange but not very harmful . I am the only one who uses that sword anyway, so why bother making it impossible to wield by everyone _but me…”_ Arthur started pacing in the confined space between his desk and the table. “…and Merlin,” he added as an afterthought.

“If it is a work of some sorcerer, he clearly cocked up,” before either Arthur or Elyan had a chance to scold Gwaine for his language in Gwen’s presence, he continued “Must be a weak one or inexperienced. After all, not all of them are invariably mighty and evil, throwing spells or curses left and right…right?”

The King sighed tiredly, rubbing his eyes with two fingers and warning him only out of a habit, “You’re bordering on treason, you know that?” However, a small voice in the back of his head (that had been making more and more frequent appearances for some time) told him Gwaine might have some point. Bu that was a problem for another day. “Never mind, I guess we won’t learn more until the two bookworms find anything. All we can do now is wait.”

“Actually, it isn’t,” Guinevere’s words gained only confused looks from them all, so she elaborated, rolling her eyes at the thickness of men. “Everyone here can read, yes? Gaius and Merlin would definitely use some help. It’s fairly early, and you were supposed to spend the rest of the afternoon on the training anyway, so I don’t think you’ve got something better to do.”

Looks of dawning comprehension appeared on the faces around her. That was in fact the most logical solution but none of them thought of it because, well… Merlin and Gaius _always_ did their research by themselves. But fair enough, usually everyone else had their own responsibilities they had to take care of. This time Arthur would also have sat down to pore over the paperwork, although he had the suspicion in his current state of mind he wouldn’t do much. Thank gods for his Queen.

The Knights looked a bit embarrassed too, for not realising this sooner. Arthur sheathed Excalibur, offered his shoulder to his amused wife and after giving nods or shrugs, the rest followed the royal couple to the Court Physicians quarters.

They got to the base of the tower in no time, even if their pace was steady and calm – rushing there would only alarm other occupants of the castle, which they obviously wanted to avoid.

Once there Arthur grabbed the handle and was to open the door to let his Queen enter but a sudden thought came up. Wanting to get his own back on Gwaine, he turned his head back and spoke quietly:

“Gwaine, I know you have the attention span of a three-year-old, but please try not to…” he trailed off abruptly, when he realised he could vaguely hear the Physician and his ward talking.

He focused more to make out their conversation, shushing the surprised Knights with a look.

 _“…wonder if it means Arthur can deflect spells thrown at him with that sword…”_ Merlin was saying with genuine curiosity. Well, their research definitely took an interesting turn. But what that has to do with…

 _“What it means, Merlin,”_ Gaius’ voice was rather stern and Arthur smiled at the image of the sheepish face his manservant’s must have made under _the eyebrow_. He could relate to the feeling. At least it seemed they had found something of use, maybe the rest of them would be spared from the tedious research. _“…is that Excalibur must have been like that since the beginning. But why…”_

_“Why would Uther have been able to fight with it then?”_

Arthur froze on the spot and he could feel others stiffen beside him too. What? What they were talking about? His father was dead long before Excalibur was even pulled from the stone. They couldn’t be referring to it then, could they? Maybe they were talking about some other sword….

 _“I got a good scolding from Kilgharrah when that happened.”_ Who the hell was Kilgharrah? He had never heard that name in his life. Something really strange was happening here and though Arthur knew eavesdropping wasn’t an overly kingly behaviour he strained his hearing to learn more.

_“If that is the case, the best option is asking these questions to the sword’s maker.”_

MAKER of Excalibur?! How was that even possible, the sword was ancient! Over the thousand questions swirling in his mind Merlin’s confused voice cut through.

 _“But Gwen and Elyan’s father has died a long time ago, so…”_ Arthur gave his wife a bewildered wide-eyed look, who in turn glanced with a slightly open mouth at her brother. However he only slowly shook his head, indicating he had no idea what was it all about either.

 _“Kilgharrah, Merlin… I meant Kilgharrah.”_ Gaius said, exasperated again.

So this Kilgharrah person made Excalibur? For the love of…HOW? It was supposed to have hundreds of years, belonging previously to King Bruta, a mighty legendary weapon. He had to be at least as old as it but then…. Arthur’s stomach made an unpleasant turn coming to a conclusion as scary as incredible – this blacksmith, this maker must be a sorcerer…. He heard the scraping of stool against floor on the other side if the door.

_“Erhm, right, that makes sense.”_

_“Hold up a minute. You’re going now?”_

_“Well, everyone else already thinks we’ll be here, searching for an answer for the rest of the day. I’m not expected to do anything more, so I may very well use it to meet up with him and get back here before it starts getting late. Maybe at least once in my life this rendezvous won’t cost me a full night’s sleep.”_

The King was sure Gaius was still saying something but his mind was elsewhere. Like on the impossible fact that somehow his Sword’s maker was still alive and not only his trusted friends knew about him, no! Merlin was going to MEET with the man, which apparently wouldn’t even be the first time! And the more he thought about it the worse it sounded. They didn’t told anyone else these information, they had hid it. He had been lied to _again_ … He hated liars… And on a such serious matter no less, so it must be bad – or at the very least not completely legal.

Arthurs’ breath hitched and though he felt like he had had been standing in front of the door for hours, only seconds must have passed. At last, he let his hand off the handle he had been gripping so hard his knuckles turned white. He lowered it slowly to his side feeling totally lost…

Then the hot fury overwhelmed him, quickly replaced by cold resolve. He clenched his fists, making up his mind instantly. He would find out the truth. But seeing as neither Gaius nor Merlin were willing to tell him what it was, he was going to do it himself.

In that moment he felt a soft hand grip his forearm, and looked down into the loving but serious eyes of his wife. They conveyed all the loyalty and trust in his judgement but at the same time urged him to made the right choice. When he then glanced at the friends behind him, the King saw the same grim expressions he himself must be sporting now. All of them heard the conversation and must have come to similar conclusions. They gave him curt nods, also expressing their support. He felt a little bit better – at least he still had people he could rely on. Good – they were going to do this together then.

They were going to follow Merlin onto this secret meeting.


	2. Only you

This whole ‘following’ turned out to be harder than any of them expected. Firstly – they were quite a large group, which didn’t make silent tracking any easier. Secondly – Merlin knew his way around the castle alright. He avoided guards, nosy staff and suspicious nobles like a professional spy (the idea Arthur still refused to entertain, not until he had a hard proof of Merlin’s malicious intentions). He used many servant side-corridors, though Gwen told him even said servants used them only occasionally nowadays. What’s more, the stealth of his suddenly secretive friend took him off guard – he had never showed this level of skill when on hunting trips! Or ever really – Merlin was clumsy and awkward, that’s just the way it was.

The next interesting thing was that Merlin didn’t go out of the castle through the many entries, no no. He just descended to the lowest parts of the castle leading into some kind of huge cave (how could have he not known about this place?), which was completely empty. The servant didn’t even stop to look around, just came down the narrow stony stairs and plummeted through the darkness with ease. An evidence he knew the way very well not to need a torch, so this escapades must have been an often thing.

In the eerie silence that encompassed them, Arthur was so grateful all he and the Knights had on them were simple, _soft_ material tunics and breeches. If they wore chainmail, it would be impossible to move without making any noise. Even then the King marvelled that their group hadn’t been discovered by Merlin already but admittedly, he was visibly immersed in deep thought and didn’t give much attention to his surroundings.

The hardest part of their self-appointed mission was when Merlin went into an almost fully dark cave passage. He didn’t slower his pace but the followers had much more problem with that. They lost him from their sight and after long minutes of walking along one of the walls Arthur was afraid they had lost him for good.

Fortunately, after yet another sharp turn on the right they spotted a dim sunlight pouring to the cave – at last an exit. Hopefully it was the one Merlin used as he was nowhere in sight. As they neared it and could see more clearly Arthur turned to look at his men. They didn’t dare to utter a single word all this time just in case, but everyone was there with him. Their determined gazes comforted him somewhat but he only gestured for the silence. Gwaine rolled his eyes with a look that clearly said ‘ _and what had we been doing all this time?’,_ which actually made him smile slightly.

However, he focused again and started to exit the cave. His vision blurred for a moment before he re-accustomed to the bright light outside. He blinked a few times to speed up the process and looked around. It seemed they emerged in some kind of deep woods – he didn’t realise they got _that far_ from the city.

After everyone left the cave (of course he gave his hand to help Guinevere) Arthur started wondering on the direction his manservant might have gone. He needn’t have worried though, because Percival keen ears picked up a soft conversation and he pointed a finger a little bit ahead of them. Giving the wall of forest a closer look Arthur could even see an outline of a clearing flashing among the dense bushes and trees, so he quietly went that way, others close behind him.

With every step he could hear the voices better and better. Merlin smooth prattle was countered with short but surprisingly deep and vibrating answers. When he finally arrived at the edge of the clearing and raised his head up from the ground where he tried to found the best path his heart froze for a second time this day.

Only long-learnt reflexes of a warrior and a leader held him back from giving a not very dignified scream. He could hear a few of his companions covering their mouths to stifle their own gasps of surprise and terror. A wave of contradicting emotions hit him so hard he couldn’t move a single muscle for a long time.

Because in the middle of the clearing, right in front of Merlin stood _A FREAKING ENORMOUS DRAGON!_ Not only stood – he was listening to Merlin, _humming_ in response once in a while. Arthur must have been hallucinating, there was no other explanation… The creature, which after closer inspection revealed itself to be the same that Arthur had supposedly killed, was calmly conversing with his simple-minded servant looking _very much alive…_!

The first impulse the King had was to protect the stupid boy and get them all out of here as fast as possible. He wanted to shout to Merlin to run away and hide, but… the dragon wasn’t attacking. It wasn’t even moving that much, so something was seriously wrong with the picture he was seeing. That’s why he only scrambled behind a wide tree trunk and put his attention on Merlin’s words. On the corner of his eye he saw others doing the same. They had to learn more before making any reckless moves that could resolve in them dying a horrific death in the hot flames of magical creature.

“…and basically it’s a mess I need to decide how to clean up, preferably without making an idiot out of myself again…. You burnished Tom’s sword, so please say it is perfectly normal and nothing dangerous,” he heard Merlin whimper last words, like he spoke with dragons every other Tuesday.

Arthur dug his fingernails into the hard bark, trying to calm his nerves. He didn’t know how long he was going to keep them reined. The creature answered with that deep voice he heard earlier, which was even more mind-blowing – since when could dragons talk?!

“I do not understand your confusion. After all, the one who is responsible for the Sword’s unique feature is you, Young Warlock.”

“Excuse me?”

“Young what?!”

“What in the name of….?!”

Many indignant and very _loud_ shouts of disbelief overlapped then, causing both occupants of the clearing to instantly turn their heads in their direction. Merlin’s eyes widened comically spotting them but that was the least of Arthur’s worries, because the dragon had clearly named Merlin a warlock. A WARLOCK – a little less common term for magic users… which meant Merlin… Merlin had magic. His head felt light trying to absorb this information. But that is not… it’s silly, Merlin can’t be a…

But how could he deny what he was observing in front of himself? Unless it was some kind of horrible nightmare or a very successful evening at the tavern with the Knights, Merlin had _betrayed_ him!

He wasn’t sure if the shakiness of his hand came from the red anger or poorly concealed hurt he felt as he came to this realisation. Another person had turned on him and he had a hard time admitting it even to himself but it was probably one of the worst. For Merlin to start practising magic, hide these secrets for gods know how long…. He could almost hear his heart shatter and then close with a cold fury.

Next thing he remember was striding across the clearing with Excalibur suddenly in his grasp, having eyes only on one traitorous, secretive, _terrified_ figure of hi- THIS scrawny servant… And yet again he was rendered speechless by Merlin’s actions. This was starting to get old…

~~~~~~~~~~~~

In Merlin’s eyes, Gwaine was the one to blame. Maybe it wasn’t completely fair, maybe bitterness and anger were speaking through him, but in that moment he didn’t care. If only the apple-loving Knight hadn’t touched Excalibur this whole situation could be avoided. But of course, he had to try and poke everything….

Getting to the meeting with Kilgharrah had been a matter of habit really, although the route through the caves was a relatively new one. After the last retake of Camelot (what had his life become to say there had been multiple attempts to take over the throne he had helped to thwart?) Merlin decided he needed a safer and faster way of speaking with the dragon than sneaking out of the castle on the middle of the night. Arthur may be sometimes oblivious but Merlin had to admit that he was taking the safety of his kingdom very seriously recently – which resulted in much more competent guards patrolling the city, among other things.

Another reason was the increase in the number of their ‘rendezvous’. In these quieter months he called the dragon more and more often, at first asking about the whereabouts of Aithusa but it soon morphed into lengthy discussions about his Dragonlord heritage or Old Religion. He was discovering a new side of his kin and would even go as far as to call Kilgharrah an honest friend right now. They had… bonded in this special and unique way only Dragon and his Dragonlord could – or at least started to in Merlin’s opinion. It was also Kilgharrah that told him about the secret passage leading near a clearing a safe distance away from the city.

Anyway, while going through the caves he informed his reptilian friend of the need to see him via their mind-speech. Well, not exactly _speech,_ as their weren’t able to communicate as clearly as Merlin could with some Druids for example, especially not at such a distance. They could send each other ‘messages’ in form of feelings and emotions mostly, so all he had to do now was to reach and mentally urge the Dragon to meet with him. It was definitely better than to shout commands in Dragon-tongue, that’s for sure.

And now his desire to consult with his kin would prove to be his downfall…. Never in his life had he felt such terror like in the moment, when after greeting Kilgharrah and describing him the situation, he heard the cries of disbelief from the edge of the clearing. Cries he would recognise everywhere, as they belonged to his dearest friends.

When he turned in their direction and saw them all among the trees, watching him with mouths hanging open, his head started spinning. He was praying to any god that may listen for it to only be a bad dream, a nightmare he would promptly wake up from.

However it was proving to be a nightmare come true instead, when after split second Arthur unsheathed Excalibur and charged at him with a look of such anger (and was it also hurt right there?), with others closely at his heels that Merlin panicked and did the first thing that came to his mind – he gave a small, _very manly_ squeak of surprise and dove behind one of Kilgharrah’s massive front paws to hide.

Ok, so maybe searching for protection behind the bulk of his friend wasn’t one of his greatest moments, but hey – his most dangerous and well-hidden secrets was just collectively discovered by all of his friends. It allowed him for a minute of weakness and _complete terror_ that gripped his heart. It was over now, his existing life was coming to an abrupt and cruel end – metaphorically at least. He was fairly sure, they wouldn’t kill him on the spot (though seeing Arthur’s stormy eyes made him reconsider this confidence again) but everything was going to change for him – be it banishment, imprisonment or any other of dozens of horrifying fates, which imagining had kept him awake at nights.

His move must have made _them_ reconsider their actions as they immediately after stopped in their tracks. He guessed the sight of a gigantic magical being, which had been presumed dead for quite some time would do that to you…. Their hesitance was the only reason he risked peaking at them and trying to fix the situation, however hopeless it may appear.

“Hey everyone… fancy meeting you here”, his stressed brain couldn’t come up with anything better. He cringed at how weak his voice sounded even to himself, so he tried to clear his throat. “So I know you’ve got a lot of… questions but it isn’t what it looks like, I swear.”

Gwaine actually gave a huff of laughter, though like others, his eyes only flickered to where Merlin was standing, not daring to let the dragon’s massive jaw from his sight for too long.

“I would love to hear the explanation for this, mate.”

“Isn’t it obvious? Our _friend_ here is conspiring with a Camelot’s sworn enemy. And escaping from justice like the coward he is,” Arthur barked, sarcasm dripping from the used term.

Merlin had hard time to decide whether he felt relieved his King spoke at last beside staring at him menacingly (he was the only one that ignored the dragon for now), worried at the coldness of his voice or offended at his words. A bit of everything probably but he addressed the last, as it was the easiest to deal with right now – others were far too painful.

“I beg your pardon, I am no…”

“Oh, you better, Merlin. You better beg for pardon, though even then I can’t guarantee you’ll see another morning…” Arthur cut him off, making another step in their direction.

Kilgharrah, who could definitely feel Merlin’s distress and who stayed suspiciously quiet until then, let a gust of air through his nostrils, strong enough to make the royals and Knights stumble a bit, which only made them raise their swords in alarm.

“It is not justice to condemn a person who saved your life many times so hastily, Young King.”

His friends still looked like they couldn’t believe the dragon was an intelligent creature and possessed the ability to speak. Nevertheless Merlin vigorously nodded, agreeing with Kilgharrah.

“Yes, just please, hear me out,” he pleaded locking his eyes with Arthur’s. “Just… give me this one chance and if you decide that I’m… a lost cause even after that, I won’t run. I’ll leave myself at your mercy, agree to your every punishment. Kilgharrah won’t attack you either, I promise, but you _need to know_ first.”

“How can we trust whatever you say, Merlin…?” Gwen’s words were so soft, so full of pain and regret that warlock’s heart broke all over again.

“You know me, just not all of me. I’m the same person but with a little extra surprise,” he tried with a smile which felt extremely unnatural.

“Sire, if I may… There is no harm in listening to him,” Percival’s quiet slip caused a small hope to blossom in Merlin’s chest. “I would say the more real threat is when we do not give him this chance,” he added rationally indicating the frowning dragon.

“And we know how it would end…” Leon was breathing heavily, sword-arm shaking almost invisibly. Right, he was the only one here, beside Arthur, who had fought him once and had no desire to do it again.

The King was fighting an evident war within himself, his emotions and logic colliding. Everyone on the clearing observed his struggle, waiting for a decision. But then to Merlin’s great relief the tip of Excalibur that was pointed at his throat lowered to the grass.

“Okay… We are going to sit and talk, sorcerer,” Arthur spat through clenched teeth. “And I warn you, you try any tricks…” he let the threat hang in the air.

He turned to sit on one of few small rocks near the treeline, beckoning the group to also make themselves comfortable. Maybe not all was lost considering they weren’t afraid to turn their back on the two of them, actually trusting subconsciously in Merlin to keep his promise.

“Come on and start talking,” Arthur said after he and the knights either put their swords on their laps or stuck them into the ground at their feet.

Merlin hesitated for a moment – he felt quite all right in the safety the proximity to the dragon gave him, thank you very much. However, he supposed he should show a sign of a good will and get closer… Before he had made up his mind, Kilgharrah apparently had enough of their foolishness and just raised the paw he was hiding behind. Then to Merlin’s utter bemusement he pushed him gently with the same paw in the direction of his friends with a sigh.

“There is no reason to worry, Young Warlock. The half cannot truly hurt what makes her whole.”

Though the others were clearly a bit distressed with Kilgharrah’s sudden movements and a bit confused at his words, Merlin felt only mild irritation at the exasperation in his voice.

“Wish I had your confidence,” he answered, rising his eyebrows when Kilgharrah laid down in the grass, facing them at some angle and observing them all with an interest Merlin rarely saw. Was it also _amusement_ he could sense?! “Whose side are you on?”

“I see no sides here. The paths of great destiny are being decided and it is an event worth experiencing,” was the only response he got.

“Stupid riddle-loving lizard deriving pleasure of my misery,” he grumbled under his nose, waving dismissively at his kin. He had more urgent worries to take care of…

While he was getting closer to the sitting group, he spotted a few furrowed brows but also very small smiles of amusement at his exchange with the dragon. That was good – he had to prove them he was still the same person….

“So… where should I start? What would you like to know?” He asked after clearing his suddenly dry throat.

“Oh I don’t know, Merlin, maybe when and why you decided to practise magic? Or the reason why are you having secret meetings with a _dead dragon?_ Or why have you lied to us about all of this?” The King watched him intently spreading his arm in a questioning manner.

“Well, I would say the last one is quite self-explanatory with me being a magic user in the heart of Camelot…” Arthur clearly didn’t approve his smart remarks judging by the glare he got.

“The rest is a rather long story ‘cause I had magic all my life. And no, I didn’t just start learning at a young age, I was literally born like this – mother says my eyes shone gold with my first breath,” he stopped hearing gasps from Gwen and Percival.

“Is that even possible?” The Queen asked.

“It’s rare but have happened before. Funny, by the laws of many kingdoms I didn’t deserve to live from my first day,” he added with a mirthless laugh.

That statement must have had quite an impact because his friends’ expressions went through an interesting chain of emotions – from wary and confused to surprised, a bit horrified and finally kind of pitying. But he didn’t want their pity, so he started pacing to avoid looking at their faces and carried on.

“And like I said, it’s a really long story, especially after arriving in Camelot…”

“We have time, go on - and only the truth now,” Arthur said but with a definitely less cold more considering tint in his voice.

So Merlin obeyed. He told them a bit of his unusual childhood but focused mainly on the adventures since he became Arthur’s manservant. Some stories were easier to tell, others brought tears of loss or regret – though through all this ordeal he never cried. His eyes watered or a bile he had to swallow rose in his throat but he didn’t let himself start crying.

His friends’ reactions differed spectacularly depending on his words. There were times when some of _them_ cried, especially Gwen after hearing how many people he lost. There were moments of anger when he told them of his many mistakes (especially releasing Kilgharrah – Arthur actually punched him then but looked rather guilty after, so…). The dragon apologised for his blind, unjustified revenge and also helped with recalling some events or explaining Merlin’s heritage as Dragonlord.

Only subject he was very vague with were the legends and prophecies about Emrys, The Once and Future King and uniting Albion. He described some but as even he wasn’t overly knowledgeable about most of it, he preferred to keep it short. He also diminished the amount of his power, deciding it would be best to slowly let them use to the idea of him being a warlock first. Although he could see they had already had their suspicions…

At some point they all ended up on the grass, even Gwen disregarding the state her dress would be in after all this. Merlin was casually sitting next to Kilgharrah, leaning back on his side, others around a small campfire (courtesy of the dragon) in semi-circle because it was getting dark. The atmosphere changed dramatically from the beginnings of his tale. Don’t get it wrong, there was still plenty of confusion, unanswered questions and uncertainty but also a lot more… understanding. Merlin saw they were hurt, however it was mostly due to him living a secretive live than a feeling of betrayal. In addition, gratitude and respect appeared, with which he felt rather self-conscious to be honest…

When at last he finished, silence fell around them. Merlin only heard deep, steady breathing behind him and thudding of his own heart. His eyes were on his hands where he played with a blade of grass between his fingers.

“All these years, Merlin… you never sought any credit or glory.” Merlin’s head shot up at his King’s words and theirs eyes met.

“I don’t need them. It’s not why I do any of this,” he responded with dry mouth.

“You’re the bravest of us all, there’s no doubt about it,” Elyan spoke softly, causing Merlin to look around at his friends. All of them now sported small but soft smiles, no trace of earlier fear or anger.

“And apparently damn powerful too,” Gwaine added with fascination. “Warlock with instinctual magic, Dragonlord and Druid’s legendary figure? No one’s that blatantly magical….”

Merlin blushed at the sudden praises and casted his eyes down again. “It’s nothing really, I still don’t know A LOT about even my own magic, not to mention…”

“Merlin.” He actually jumped a few inches up surprised with the sudden presence next to him. Arthur gently put a hand on his shoulder, forcing him to look up at him. “There’s no other man who has done more for us and all of Camelot. Thank you, my friend. And I’m sorry for what you had to come through.”

The sincerity in his voice touched Merlin to the heart, which felt like might burst any moment with relief and happiness. He dreamt of the moment he could come clean with them, not daring to hope at the same time.

“No Arthur, thank you – for the acceptance you give me, which is so contrary from everything that you learnt.” He beamed at all of his friends, who finally looked relaxed observing the emotional moment.

Merlin also felt a wave of contentment in the back of his head and glanced at the dragon still with a huge grin on his face. Which reminded him of the initial reason they ended up here…

“Hey Kilgharrah, you never had the chance to finish – what did you mean by _me_ being responsible for Excalibur’s strange behaviour?”

The others immediately perked up at his question, eager for some information. The dragon raised his scaly equivalent of eyebrow.

“I meant exactly what I said. I may be the one that burnished it but you made it possible to be wielded only by the young Pendragon.”

“But that is not quite right, is it? From what Merlin told us, King Uther also fought with it, not mentioning Merlin himself,” Leon questioned, still a tad nervous from directly addressing the dragon, who moved his attention on the Knight.

“That is correct, Loyalty. Merlin hadn’t yet enchanted the Sword at the time the late Pendragon wielded it.” Everyone were confused at the term the dragon used for Leon, apart from Merlin who only looked considering. After a moment he flicked his fingers and smiled, when everything clicked.

“The stone, right?” He asked his kin, who only nodded proudly, then tried to explain to his friends. “After using Excalibur to break the Immortal Army, I realised how powerful and dangerous this sword is. I mean, I kind of knew it before, but it just really hit me then, so I decided to hide it somewhere safe. When I was putting it in that rock, all my thoughts were on making sure _only the worthy one would be able to wield it,_ which obviously meant Arthur as it was made especially for him. My magic must have acted on my will… which used to happen before,” he ended up lamely, scratching the back of his head.

The amazement in others eyes only increased and a few laughs broke out among them.

“Only you, Merlin, only you…” Percival shook his head, wondering at his peculiar friend.

But then Merlin’s brow furrowed again and he looked up at Kilgharrah. “Though how I enchanted it is a mystery for me. Gaius’ book said weapons burnished in dragons’ breath cannot be enchanted. And it doesn’t explain why I am able to carry Excalibur too…”

“I have never before heard of it, but we have already seen, Young Warlock, that many usual rules of magic do not apply to you. However, ability to enchant the sword burnished in the dragon's breath could also have to do with you being the Dragonlord. Wielding Excalibur must be the natural consequence of that.”

Merlin hummed in acknowledgement, shrugging it off for later consideration. Now he wanted to know something much more interesting.

“So how did you guys ended up here anyway?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Later at night when Arthur laid in his bed, Gwen snuggled at his side sleeping soundly, he came to the conclusion that he didn’t fully agree with the dragon’s reasoning. In his opinion Excalibur, just like its master, simply deemed Merlin _worthy._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! All kudos and reviews are appreciated :D


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